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What you’ll learn in this article

• Why telling your body to relax doesn’t work, and what to try instead
• The physiological logic behind progressive muscle relaxation (PMR)
• How to practise the full sequence, including which muscle groups and for how long
• Why the abbreviated version is the one worth working toward
• Where PMR fits in a broader CBT-I program

You’ve been in bed for twenty minutes. Tired, genuinely tired, but your shoulders are up near your ears and your jaw is clenched around nothing in particular. The mind isn’t the only thing that won’t let go.

Physiological and cognitive arousal are related, but they aren’t the same thing. You can slow your thoughts and still find your body holding onto the day’s tension. For people with insomnia, that physical residue is real: elevated muscle tone, a slightly raised heart rate, a nervous system that hasn’t finished coming down. Telling it to relax doesn’t do much. The instruction has nowhere to land.

Progressive muscle relaxation approaches this differently. Rather than asking your body to release tension directly, it asks you to create tension first, deliberately, in one muscle group at a time, then let it go. The contrast between tense and released is what teaches the body to recognise relaxation. Edmund Jacobson, the American physician who developed the technique in the 1920s, built it on a simple premise: physical relaxation produces mental calm. Not the other way round.

It has a solid evidence base. A landmark review by Morin and colleagues (1999) published in Sleep (the American Academy of Sleep Medicine’s full review of non-pharmacological insomnia treatments) rated PMR an effective intervention for chronic insomnia. It remains one of the most consistently recommended relaxation techniques in clinical practice, and is frequently incorporated into CBT-I treatment programs.

How the tension-release cycle works

When you deliberately tense a muscle, you heighten the contrast before releasing it. That contrast is the mechanism. Most people walk around with a baseline level of muscle tension they’ve stopped noticing; it’s become their normal. PMR works by making the difference between tense and released legible again. The body already knows how to let go. It does it every night when sleep arrives. This practice makes that release available earlier, without waiting for exhaustion to force it.

The technique also gives the mind something to do. For people whose thoughts race at bedtime, a structured body-focused practice provides an anchor. Not a distraction, exactly, but a redirect. Instead of narrating tomorrow’s to-do list, your attention is occupied with a sequence. It doesn’t need to be interesting; that’s partly the point.

How to practise

The following instructions are drawn from the VA Whole Health Library’s clinical PMR protocol (Mirgain & Singles, 2016, updated 2023), one of the most widely used references for this technique.

Setup

• Lie down in a comfortable position. Loose clothing helps.
• Set aside 15 to 20 minutes, more if you’re new to it.
• Sync your breath with the movements: breathe in as you tense each muscle group, breathe out as you release. Don’t hold your breath.

For each muscle group

• Tense for five seconds, firmly but not so hard it strains.
• Release all at once.
• Pause for 10 to 20 seconds. Notice what relaxation feels like in that area before moving on.

Key finding: The pause matters as much as the tension. Rushing through the release defeats the purpose. The nervous system needs a moment to register the difference.

The sequence (feet to face)

• Feet and calves: curl your toes downward, then point them toward your head on the next pass
• Thighs: press them together or lift slightly
• Buttocks: tighten and hold
• Abdomen: draw it in
• Hands: clench both fists
• Forearms and biceps: bend at the elbows, tense the arms
• Shoulders: shrug toward your ears
• Neck: gently press your head back into the pillow
• Face: scrunch the forehead, close the eyes firmly, clench the jaw gently, press the lips together

If any group causes pain or cramping, reduce the tension or skip it entirely. The goal is awareness of contrast, not maximum effort.

After moving through the full sequence, lie still for a minute. Notice the difference between how your body feels now and how it felt at the start.

The abbreviated version is the one worth building toward

PMR typically takes several sessions before it feels natural. The first attempt often produces more awareness of how tense you were than any obvious relaxation. That’s useful information, not failure.

Once you’ve practised the full sequence regularly, a shortened version becomes available: tensing just the hands, face, and shoulders can be enough to trigger the whole-body release response. Some people eventually get there with a single muscle group. That condensed version is worth working toward. It’s a tool you can use in two minutes rather than twenty.

Key finding: Morin et al. (1999) found that relaxation-based approaches worked best when practised consistently over several weeks rather than used reactively on bad nights. The skill builds with repetition, not just intention.

One objection worth naming: people with insomnia sometimes become more anxious when they pay close attention to their body at bedtime, not less. If you find that happening, this may not be the right starting point. Guided imagery is an alternative that keeps attention more external, and some people find it easier to settle into. Guided imagery and PMR address different things, and they can be layered: PMR first for the physical arousal, then imagery for the cognitive layer.

Where PMR fits

PMR is a complement to the core behavioural work of CBT-I, not a replacement for it. Relaxation techniques reduce physiological arousal, but they don’t address the sleep drive and conditioned wakefulness that keep chronic insomnia running. That work requires a structured programme.

Worth knowing: Jacobson’s original premise (that physical relaxation produces mental calm) holds up, but it works downstream of behaviour. If the conditions keeping insomnia in place haven’t changed, relaxation practice reduces the discomfort without resolving the problem.

If you’ve tried PMR and found it useful but still aren’t sleeping well, that’s a common pattern. The relaxation piece is working; the other pieces aren’t in place yet. What I see in clinic is that people who’ve done relaxation practice often come in with a real skill they just haven’t had a chance to use properly, because the sleep window is wrong, or the association between bed and wakefulness hasn’t been addressed, or both.

TL;DR: What we covered

• Telling your body to relax doesn’t work because the instruction has nowhere to land. PMR uses deliberate tension to make the contrast between tense and released legible again.
• The physiological mechanism is contrast, not effort. Tense firmly for five seconds, release all at once, pause to notice. The awareness is the point.
• The full sequence runs from feet to face. Most sessions take 15 to 20 minutes. With regular practice, an abbreviated version covering just hands, face, and shoulders can produce the same effect.
• If body-scanning increases your anxiety, that’s useful information. Guided imagery is an alternative that some people find easier.
• PMR reduces physiological arousal. It doesn’t address the behavioural drivers of chronic insomnia. Those require a structured programme.

Working on the deeper patterns behind your insomnia? I offer a free 15-minute initial consultation to talk through what’s going on and whether CBT-I might help.

References

Mirgain, S. A., & Singles, J. (2016, updated 2023). Progressive muscle relaxation. VA Whole Health Library. https://wholehealth.wisc.edu/tools/progressive-muscle-relaxation/

Morin, C. M., Culbert, J. P., & Schwartz, S. M. (1999). Nonpharmacological interventions for insomnia: A meta-analysis of treatment efficacy. Sleep, 17(6), 526–533. https://doi.org/10.1093/sleep/17.6.526